When "Everyday Talk" Goes Too Far

[Scene: Anastasia & Evangeline are eating at the child-sized indoor picnic table when Anastasia asks Chris if he will sit beside her. Chris explains to Anastasia that he cannot sit there because he is too big.]

Evangeline: Yeah, because your bottom is bigger than ours, right?
Dad: Yes.
Evangeline: And [names censored out of courtesy]'s bottoms are bigger than yours. And JESUS's bottom is bigger than EVERYBODY's because he is bigger than EVERYTHING!

Reverse Psychology Works Well With This Age

Chris: We need to put on our pajamas.
Anastasia: No!
Chris: What are you going to do? Stay up all night?
Anastasia: No, I need to go to bed!

We Wouldn't Want to Take Ourselves TOO Seriously, Now Would We?

Evangeline: See what a good job I'm doing [holding Hosea]! Daddy, call me "mini-mom!"
Aunt R: Are you a mini-mom?
Evangeline: Of course not, Aunt R. That's just a joke!
Aunt R: You tell so many jokes. Is anything you do very serious?
Evangeline: (thinking)
Chris: What about CC (our homeschool co-op/curriculum)?
Evangeline: Well, yes, CC is serious for me......sometimes.

What Verse was That Again?

Evangeline: Aunt R, can you please go destroy my sister?
Aunt R: Destroy?
Evangeline: Yes, the Bible says grown-ups can destroy children if they disobey!

Actually, I Think She's Still Confused on Both Points Sometimes

Evangeline: Hosea will be so surprised when he grows up to be a kid and finds out his name is Hosea!

Aunt R: Like you were surprised when you were a kid and found out your name was Evangeline?

Evangeline: Yeah, when I was a kid, but that was a long time ago.

Wow, That Sounds Really Intense

Eliana: I am covered in burning hotness!

Attack of the Killer Cookies

Jennifer: We don't want to put the balls of cookie dough too close together on the baking sheet.
Evangeline: Yeah, because they'll ATTACK each other, right?

Lasterday

Evangeline's newest fabricated word:

Lasterday: an indefinite time in the past

Allow Me to Introduce to You My Superhuman Baby

Evangeline: Mommy, Hosea has red lasers for eyes!

We're Back!

Sorry for the lack of posts! We've been out town, but we're back now and looking forward to more random thoughts! Stay tuned!

Dream Catcher

Evangeline (in response to Eliana describing one of her favorite dreams and wishing it could be real): Eliana, I'm taking your dream!

That Explains a Lot

Eliana: I am itchy in my blood! That happens to me sometimes.

Is This the Tim Burton Version?

Eliana & Evangeline: We are playing Moses and Zipporah, except we're pretending things that aren't in the real story, like going for a walk, hiding from a giant spider, and having a baby named Basagna!

Flying South for Winter

Evangeline: Look! The clouds are hibernating!
(Note: I'm pretty sure she meant "migrating.")

If That Was Currency, She'd Be Rich

Eliana: I'm going to pay [for ice cream] with my ten cents!
Evangeline: I'm going to pay with nonsense!

The Incredible, Edible...Pumpkin

Evangeline: Pumpkins are my favorite kind of egg!

Thou Shalt Obey Evangeline

Evangeline (to Eliana): When I stay, "Stop!" you stop right away! The Bible says so!

Imagine What She Must See in the Clouds

Evangeline: Mom! Hosea had some spit-up, and it was shaped like a placenta!

Lost in Translation

Evangeline: What are you eating?
Chris: Yaki udon noodles.
(Evangeline tries one.)
Evangeline: No, Daddy, they're YUMMY udon noodles!

Do You Have a Permit For That?

Bible Trivia Game: After the six days of creation, what did God do on the seventh day?
Eliana: He rested!
Evangeline: He was arrested!

America: Too Cool for School

Evangeline: Mom, do we have to be older to go on a school bus?
Me: Well, we don't really have any reason to go on a school bus.
Evangeline: Because we're Americans, right?

You and I Both, Kid.

Anastasia (whining): I want coffee!

Beat That!

[Background: Eliana, Hosea and I went to Tennessee for a few days in early August. While we were gone, Chris stayed at home with Evangeline and Anastasia. Ever since we have returned, Eliana and Evangeline can occasionally be heard comparing what-we-did-while-you-were-gone stories. It started out innocently enough, but Evangeline's stories have become increasingly fantastical. We're not sure if this is just another case of the line between Evangeline's imagination and reality blurring or if she just really likes messing with Eliana's head.]

Eliana (skeptically): Daddy, Evangeline said that you went for a walk in space while we were in Tennessee. Did you really go to space?

Sweet Dreams

Eliana (praying before bed): Please help me to have the same dream as last night because I really like it a lot.

Precious Prayers

Eliana: Dear Heavenly Father, thank you for Hosea. Thank you for making him so cute. Please make him even cuter. Thank you for making him a covenant promise. Please help Hosea to sleep well tonight so that Mommy and Daddy can sleep well. They don't get a lot of sleep. In Jesus's name, Amen.

Ummm...

Evangeline: Mom, when Hosea grows up, how old will he be?

Proud Citizen of "The Land of the Cool Things to Do"

Evangeline: We are Americans because we live in Ohio and because we know about cool things to do, right?

Most girls wish for a pony. Mine wishes for an orca whale.

Eliana: I wish that our house could be mostly dry but still big enough to have a whale tank downstairs.

Ours Didn't Come With That Option

Evangeline (looking at the buttons on the dashboard of our Honda Odyssey): Mom, where is the button that makes fire?

And So It Begins...

I have long chastised myself for not being better about recording the funny, interesting, sweet, smart, amusing, intriguing things my children are always saying. I've written them down on papers and in notebooks only to loose them. Every now and then, one of these sayings will make an appearance on my other blog or on my Facebook page, but I think it's high time that I put them in one easy to archive and retrieve location. In hindsight, I really can't see why it's taken me so long to do this, especially in light of the fact that I've had the idea floating around in my head for at least a year now.

But better late than never! I hope to occasionally back-post some older sayings as I happen to recall them, but I'm going to go ahead and get started on the present-day musings. I have entitled the blog Random Thoughts by Evangeline & Co. due to the vast majority of pure "randomness" coming from our second-born, but you can be sure that I will include material from all as it arises.

I am recording this archive of questions, statements and conversations mostly for my own benefit, but as so many people in our lives seem genuinely amused by "Evangeline sayings" I knew it would be wrong to keep this treasure all to myself. So, here you go. I hope you enjoy!

Evangeline pretending to be a dinosaur