At Least She's Honest

Anastasia: Mom, I want your food.
Me: No, Anastasia. You can't have Mommy's food.
Anastasia: Mommy, you makin' me sad!
Me: But if you eat my food, then I'll be sad. Do you care if Mommy is sad?
Anastasia: No!

Interview with My Daughters

1. What is something mom always says to you?

E1 (6 years old): I love you.

E2 (4 years old): I love you.

A (2 years old): No, I don't want to play that game.

2. What makes mom happy?

E1: cake

E2: when we show funny faces at her

A: No, I'm sick. (She's not.)

3. What makes mom sad?

E1: when you disobey

E2: when we disobey

A: [leaves room]

4. How does your mom make you laugh?

E1: by showing a funny face

E2: by singing a silly song

5. What was your mom like as a child?

E1: She had nice black hair all the way down to here. [points to waist]

E2: a kid

6. How old is your mom?

E1: Almost 29, but 28 right now.

E2: 20

7. How tall is your mom?

E1: 100 feet tall. No wait...Where's a ruler? No, you are 100 inches!

E2: This tall. [spreads arms wide apart]

8. What is her favorite thing to do?

E1: school

E2: playing games with us

9. What does your mom do when you're not around?

E1: She falls asleep on the couch.

E2: watches over Anastasia

10. If your mom becomes famous, what will it be for?

E1: for teaching her children how to ice skate (Is this supposed to be a hint?)

E2: her children

11. What is your mom really good at?

E1: making desserts

E2: fixing things

12. What is your mom not very good at?

E1: climbing a big mountain

E2: building a playset

13. What does your mom do for a job?

E1: She works around the house all day. You know, you wash the clothes. You dry the clothes. You sort the clothes. You fold the clothes. You put away the clothes. You feed Hosea. You wash the dishes. You do school with us and a bunch of other stuff!

E2: School

14. What is your mom's favorite food?

E1: Chinese food

E2: chicken

15. What makes you proud of your mom?

E1: when she wins a game

E2: when she eats her food all gone

16. If your mom were a cartoon character, who would she be?

E1: She has long, black hair like Princess Jasmine.

E2: Gigi's mom

17. What do you and your mom do together?

E1: school

E2: play games

18. How are you and your mom the same?

E1: We have long hair, and we look a lot alike.

E2: I want to be done now.

19. How are you and your mom different?

E1: We don't have the same color hair, and she's a grown-up and I'm a kid.

E2: I don't know.

20. How do you know your mom loves you?

E1: She gives me hugs and kisses and a bunch of love.

E2: 'cause she keeps saying that to me

21. What does your mom like most about your dad?

E1: She's married to him.

E2: I'm tired of this.

22. Where is your mom's favorite place to go?

E1: Panera, with me!

E2: [leaves room]